The following is a special presentation of Bragging Rights Sports:
(For Those About To Rock playing)
(“Pain lasts only until you’re ready to go again.” -Jon Miller)
(AND THESE GUYS ARE READY TO GO AGAIN)
BRAGGING RIGHTS SPORTS PRESENTS:
A MARYLAND CULTURE PRODUCTION
TWO HEADQUARTERS, 8 MEMBERS, ONE GOAL
CHARM CITY BEASTS
FROM HUMAN TO MASCOT
NEVER SAY DIE
(Michael Hession) “WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE!”
(Jennifer Shoemaker) “DRESSED TO IMPRESS!”
(The Salty Marylander) “WE’VE GOT SERIOUS FISH TO FRY!”
(Kate Addison) “DEAD! MAN! WALKING!”
(Poe) “UNLIMIIIIITED!”
(Edgar) “SHAKE AND BAKE!”
(Allan) “EVERYBODY!”
(Violet) “WE CAME TO PLAY!”
(SEASON 6)
(EPISODE 4: THE RAVEN BROTHERS SPOOKY STATEMENT
(“IT’S SIMPLE WHEN GOD IS FOR YOU? WHO COULD BE AGAINST YOU!”)
(“THERE’S NO PLACE LIKE BALTIMOOOOOOOORE!”)
(“WHO’S GOT IT BETTER THAN US!? NOOOOOOOOOOBODY!”)
(October 29 2025, Charm City Beasts Headquarters, Miami FL)
Madame: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! THIS IS MY TERRITORY! Head Outlaw: Oh please! Just when we took over this place, now we’re on the verge of losing it in the blink of an eye. Madame: Yes you are your majesty. FOR I HAVE CONQUERED THE RAVENBOTS PREVIOUSLY OWNED BY THE CHARM CITY BEASTS! Outlaw: Come on! Madame: GET THEM! (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) Outlaws: AAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Madame: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! THIS IS MY LAND NOW! BOW DOWN YOUR MAJESTY! I DARE YOU TO ATTACK ME MR HESSION! NOW WHERE ARE THOSE BEASTS!
(Charm City Beasts Headquarters, Baltimore MD)
Michael: Poe I think it’s safe to say that it feels good to be home again. Poe: Whistling (I know buddy. It’s great to have you and Jennifer back) Michael: Trust me, it sucked being captured by the Swifties again, although not as bad as the first time. Poe: Whistling (Well all of us were captured then) Michael: Yeah, that was rough, but hey we made it through. Poe: Whistling (Thank goodness you came back when you did) Michael: I know, our Miami headquarters have been taken over. Poe: Whistling (Yeah I know. At least Jennifer and Violet are dancing once again in the media room) Jennifer/Violet: I COULD BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND FOR THE WEEKEND! YOU COULD BE MY BOYFRIEND FOR THE NIGHT! Michael: The more things change the more they stay the same Poe. Poe: Whistling (It’s so cool that both of our girls are besties with each other) Michael: Isn’t that ironic. Poe: Whistling (Yup) Michael: Anyways, what do you think of going dressed for this fight on Halloween? Poe: Whistling (I don’t know, but I forgot to show you a video of me dressed as Morgan Wallen) Michael: Lets see what you got? “And I had some help. Raven Bros: Whistling (ARRRRRRRRRR!)” Poe: Whistling (Whatcha think?) Michael: Poe, you along with Edgar and Allan looked awesome. Although I’m more shocked that the other two didn’t bring out the cowboy look. Poe: Whistling (Yup, they didn’t want to get fancy. Although Violet was looking quite fancy with her heeled cowboy boots) Violet: Whistling (What’d you say about me) Poe: Whistling (I was saying that when we did the Morgan Wallen impersonation, you looked good out there) Violet: Whistling (I sure did) Marylander: GUYS NO MORE TALKING! WE’VE GOT ANOTHER DEVELOPING STORY! Michael: Can we just give it a minute please? Marylander: Alright fine. PAUSE.
(Journey To Rome Part 1 playing) Michael: This stretch is going to hurt. The Ravens following a certain massacre in Arrowhead were completely derailed in every sense of the word. Not only was it quite possibly the successor to the London Fiasco against Jacksonville in 2017, every single key player not named King Henry got injured in that game. Lamar Jackson and Roquan Smith and Kyle Hamilton and Marlon Humphrey and Nate Wiggins and Tyler Linderbaum and Ronnie Stanley. All were out at least a week due to injury. That’s $175M worth of players right there. The Boys in Purple weren’t just affected by the Honolulu Flu. This was the Honolulu Plague they were dealing with. (And worse for me it spread over to their NCAA comparison in Penn State) Against Houston it was a throwback to Week 16 of 2013 against the Patriots. Where both sides of the ball were completely massacred for 60 minutes. Even worse it was against the Texans, the one team that Baltimore had consistently tormented for years. They got their revenge for 2011 and 2023 by handing the Ravens a 34 point defeat, tying the record for the worst home loss in franchise history. Little Time Rush was straight up hammered due to a lack of mobility and Houston’s strong defense. As for Zach Orr’s unit. The less said the better. Even Odafe Oweh saw through this mess and wanted out. Luckily for him he was shipped off to the Chargers for a solid safety in Alohi Gilman.
(Romantic Battle Rome playing) Now here lies the turning point for the Ravens defense. Even though they may have had quite possibly the worst pass rush in franchise history thanks to injuries and being handed one of the toughest early season schedules in NFL History, Baltimore could still see the light. The Gilman trade allowed Zorro to do one thing with Kyle Hamilton. Marylander: TAKE HIM BACK TO THE BOX! Michael: And they would do just that. The following week against the Rams, the defense stepped up, holding LA’s offense to just 17 points, and making Matthew Stafford’s life a living hell. It would be if Little Time Rush wasn’t so pathetic in this offense. Things got so bad, that he was benched for Snoop Huntley in the 2nd Half. (Two Brotherly Shoves without Patrick Ricard on the field? Disaster waiting to happen) The chants to fire Boy Wonder Johnny Harbaugh were loud and clear on that windy day. Too bad for those in attendance, Steve Bisciotti is a Rooney in all but name. Nothing’s going to change as long as he owns the team. (Prepare yourselves for 1993 Houston Oilers comparisons) At 1-5 it looked as if the Ravens season was over and everyone was going to get fired even though Bisciotti never makes any executive or coaching changes unless they retire or have their contracts expire. But just like last year after they lost to the Raiders to drop to 0-2, they needed a PSNTV personality to inject them with fire to refuel their confidence; “Lamar Jackson and this entire Ravens team has not been playing the way they have been expecting to, when they came in as Super Bowl Contenders.” (BOOOOOOOOOOOM!) PAUSE.
If you thought this was the end of this nonsense, oh how wrong are you. Even with Patrick Ricard and Roquan Smith coming back from injury, the Ravens still were in the headlines for the wrong reason. While Lamar Jackson was at practice all week leading up to the Bears game, he was a limited participant and ran the scout team. But the piece de resistance was still yet to come. On Friday of that week, Planet LJ initially was listed as a full participant and was expected to play. Then it was revealed a day later that yes he wasn’t getting starting reps and Harbaugh had lied about the whole situation. The cost. A $100,000 fine. That’s it? I thought that the NFLPA would strip them of their 2nd Round pick for crying out loud. (Dodged a bullet there) In some ways it seemed as if the Freddie Gray Curse was on the verge of getting National Attention especially given how much the Ravens season mirrored that of the Orioles given the preseason expectations and talented roster. Just like in many soap operas it seemed as if nothing else could get more dysfunctional and the world be damned in Baltimore (UrinatingTree called this mess Thats So Raven. You know the Disney Channel show that last aired during the year that Brian Billick got axed?). All the signs were pointing to the Ravens getting blown out by a Chicago team on a 4 game winning streak with a defense leading the league in turnovers facing Tyler Huntley. But just as he did against Chicago in Week 11 of 2021, Snoop put together a winning performance. Only this time he was even better. And the defense contained Caleb Williams and that high powered Bears offense. While Chicago did get a good bit of yardage, the Ravens kept stopping them near the gates of the end zone. Mike Green and Nate Wiggins have been awakened. As has King Henry thank god! In what looked to be the deathnail to the season, Baltimore was now alive and well. And better yet, Lamar’s coming back too and they’ve got an easy schedule. Sounds like a typical Bears showing where they lose in what looks to be a winnable spot. Now onto Miami and another serving of Grilled Dolphin on a Stick! Marylander/Edgar: THERE’S GONNA BE SOME BEAR NECESSITIES THE GLORIES OF NOT BLOWING A BIG LEAD! FORGET ABOUT THAT 1-5 RECORD! I HEAR THE BEAR NECESSITIES WE ROAST CALEB WILLIAMS AND REFEREES, THE AFC NORTH WILL IS ABOUT TO BE UP FOR GRABS! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! PAUSE.
(October 31 2025, Charm City Beasts Headquarters, Baltimore MD)
Michael: What was the developing story again Salty Marylander that you told me the other day? Marylander: You know how the South Florida Outlaws took over our Miami headquarters? Michael: Uh yes? Marylander: Apparently they were kicked out. Michael: YES! Does that mean we get our second home back. (WHOOSH!) Madame: HELLO THERE! Marylander: AH YOU ARE SO GOOD LOOKING! Kate: SALTY MARYLANDER WHAT ARE YOU DOING! Marylander: C’MERE! Madame: WHAT A WASTE OF YOUR TIME! (BOOM!) Marylander: AAAAAAAAA! Madame: YOUR MIAMI HEADQUARTERS ARE NOW MINE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (WHOOSH!) Allan: Whistling (Who was that woman in the red dress?) Michael: MADAME ROUGE!!! Violet: Whistling (WHO!) Michael: One of the Greatest Supervillains of All Time! Marylander: Wait what? I didn’t know who she was. I could have sworn. Kate: Well then you shouldn’t have fallen for her in the first place. Marylander: Sorry I made you jealous. Kate: You’re fine, just don’t let it happen again. Marylander: Sounds good. Michael: Anyways, if you couldn’t tell, THAT’S THE WOMAN WHO NOW HAS CONTROL OF OUR MIAMI HEADQUARTERS! Violet: Whistling (I didn’t even know of her until you told me)
Michael: Jennifer please explain her backstory. Jennifer: MADAME ROUGE! One of the cruelest and most vicious villains ever created by DC Comics. She is incredibly conceited and thinks she is better than most of her rivals. She despises children and in our case the Raven Brothers. She believes that children are useless and believes that only she is deserving of the title of true villain. She is snooty and a snob because of her tremendous attitude, which fits her stereotyped French accent. Actions, in her instance, speak louder than words. Rouge is a classic stretcher. A bad girl whose entire body is molecularly fluid. Her extraordinary flexibility and malleability, in particular, speak for itself. She has complete control over her physical makeup, allowing her to alter her form and look as she pleases. She is extremely expert at disguising herself; she can mimic someone else’s voice and move her limbs over great distances. Madame Rouge is a superb spy and infiltrator, as well as a lethal hand-to-hand combatant. Her brutality has given her the ability to intimidate. When challenged by her, almost every hero she’s battled has shown indications of unease. In other words, it would be like if I were a supervillain instead of a hero and wore the same dress all the time. Edgar: Whistling (Are you done yet?) Jennifer: Anyways, WE CAN’T LET HER GET AWAY WITH THIS! Michael: From how I see it, she saw what the Motown Mauler did to us on Blackout Night and wants to humiliate us in a similar fashion. However even if she does have the power to teleport from place to place, she doesn’t have the power to clone herself. KNOCK ON WOOD! Jennifer: I heard a rumor while we were locked in that cell room on the Swiftie Airship reading that she’s secretly dating the Motown Mauler. Michael: OH GOD! Kate: Didn’t the Mauler get engaged to his high school girlfriend after he beat us? Jennifer: She got killed by Madame Rouge while he was attacking us. Poe: Whistling (I’m more shocked that he didn’t betray her for doing that) Jennifer: Well they made out for three hours straight after he got back from Baltimore according to several reports from the Detroit area. Michael: I don’t think the two of us have kissed for more than 5 minutes straight Jennifer, but for 3 hours? I hope we don’t get near that point despite our love for each other. Jennifer: Well she wanted to have you know what with the Mauler. Michael: Woof. Marylander: Does that mean that we’re going to face him again tonight? Jennifer: I don’t think so just because he just attacked the Swiftie Empire right after Michael and I escaped. Marylander: Good. So they must have captured him and now Madame wants to use us to get him out of there. Michael: JUST AS I THOUGHT! Anyways guys, we’re heading for Miami, get ready. THIS IS GOING TO BE FUN!
(Charm City Beasts Headquarters, Miami FL)
Madame: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (BOOOOOM!) Raven Bros: Whistling (ARRRRRR!) “SPOOKY SCARY SKELETONS SEND SHIVERS DOWN YOUR SPINE! SHRIEKING SKULLS WILL SHOCK YOUR SOUL! SEAL YOUR DOOM TONIGHT!” Madame: HAHAHAHAHA! Those adorable birds who look like Ghostbusters have no chance against me. Jennifer: THINK AGAIN! Michael: THERE’S SOMETHING STRANGE IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD! And I mean strange. Madame: Your gimmicks will spell your doom. Marylander/Kate: I DON’T THINK SO! Madame: Oh really. Jennifer: Normally I’m not a selfish girl, but in this case. LET ME HANDLE THIS! Michael: You sure about this? Jennifer: MWA! Michael: Uh, why did you just give me mistletoe? Jennifer: That was my way of saying yes. Michael: Alright then. GO GET EM! Madame: Bad decision. (SNATCH!) “16 in 5 years, and the kick is good.” Beasts: AAAAAAAH! Jennifer: Oh you’ve done it now. PLEASE LET GO OF MY FRIENDS! Madame: Never. (Flamethrower playing) Jennifer: Then you’ll do so the old fashion way. (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) 2nd and 7, off play action, pass is caught, 1st Down 19 yard line, and the ball is now out, the ball is out, picked up by the Ravens.” Madame: UGH! Jennifer: You may have put them in a cage, but it won’t be for long (WHOOSH!) “4th and Goal. There he goes again, and this time it’s caught for the touchdown by the Tight End Mark Andrews.” Madame: WHERE DID YOU GET THAT MAGNET! Jennifer: Not telling. Because I have the key to the cell now. (WHOOSH!) “And Patterson misses. Wide right.” Michael: YES! Violet: Whistling (Come on Bestie!) Jennifer: I’ve gotcha. (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) “This should be the final play of the quarter. Lamar gets away, Lamar throws, finds a wide open Isaiah Likely.” Madame: OOOOUCH! “Pass is caught by Andrews for another touchdown!” Jennifer: This is just the start Madame Rouge! Madame: Fine. (SLASH!) “A 43 yard attempt, and this one is good.” Beasts: AAAAAAAAH! Jennifer: NO! Madame: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I’ve locked up your friends again, and there’s nothing you can do! Jennifer: I’ve got more magnets up my sleeve! (WHOOSH!) “And away they go, and there’s gonna be nobody around in the endzone, nobody there.” Madame: AGAIN! Jennifer: I GOTCHA ONCE AGAIN MADAME! Poe: Whistling (She’s a… FLAMETHROWER AT NIGHT!) Jennifer: Enough time for me to fight on my own. I need some help. Michael: Raven Brothers. Raven Bros: Whistling (Yes boss) Michael: Time to take control. Raven Bros: Whistling (Aye!) Madame: Where’s that pretty girl right now? Too scared. Raven Bros: Whistling (YOU GET US INSTEAD!) Madame: HAHAHAHA! (Ghostbusters playing) (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) “Lamar under center, Lamar under pressure, wide open again this time to #88 Charlie Kolar.” Poe: Whistling (Eddie, GO FOR THE THROAT!) Edgar: Whistling (On it!) (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) Allan: Whistling (FIRE GUNS FOR DAYS!) “Jackson throws, open man, making the grab, cutting inside, tackled to the 10 yard line, Zay Flowers.” Violet: Whistling (Come on fellas!) (BOOM!) “Looks around deep drop, fires over the middle, Touchdown Rashod Bateman.” Michael: How is she still alive with this beating we’re giving her? Kate: I don’t know but this is the first time where I think it’s safe to say that we’re back. Michael: Yeah, the Raven Brothers look really good after getting that much rest after the Swiftie Fiasco. Marylander: KEEP FIRING! “Ravens are saying that they got a turnover and I think they did, they do.” Madame: Ugh, where am I? Michael: Let me settle this right now. Madame Rouge you hung tough but you’re getting sentenced to the Atlantic Ocean. Madame: Go ahead blast me out there, because I will be back. Michael: OH BS! (BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!) “Tua deep downfield, and it’s going to be intercepted by Starks, the rookie 1st Round pick.” (SPLASH!) Jennifer: OH THAT WINNING FEELING IS BACK! Michael: Yes it is. We took down Madame Rouge, and now we have our Miami Headquarters all to ourselves again. Poe: Whistling (My swimming pool) Jennifer: My dance floor! Violet: Whistling (My DJ booth) Michael: Oh what a joy this is right now. (Viking Horn) Kate: What’s that sound? Marylander: WE’RE UNDER ATTACK AGAIN! Michael: OH COME ON NOW! PAUSE.
(Rival Appears playing) Madame: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I’M BAAAAAAAAAACK! Michael: MADAME ROUGE!!! Madame: I told you I would come back, and I brought some friends with me too. Jennifer: You brought an army of Vikings didn’t you? Madame: I did. And now I’m about to destroy your home once and for all. Michael: We’ll see about that. Guys here’s the plan. Raven Brothers, you guys as well as the Salty Marylander, Violet, and Kate will try and shoot them down using two large motor boats. Jennifer, you and I will try and shoot them down from the rooftop area, but remember, no dancing at least until this thing is settled. Jennifer: I like it. Madame Rouge for sure is going to want to focus her attention on us, but she won’t know where to find us. Michael: That’s why I set it up this way. Anyways. LET’S GET TO IT! (POP! POP! POP! POP!) “McCarthy on 3rd Down, throwing it up for Nailor and he drops a dime! Nailor with a move and a stiff arm, Nailor still on his feet, another stiff arm and down inside the 5.” Michael: I didn’t know Viking Ships had cannons inside of them. Jennifer: Sounds like Madame Rouge wants to go for the throat. (POPPPPPPPPP!) “It’s Jones to the left, Jones to the end zone. Vikings on top early.” Vikings: ARRRRRRRRRR! Michael: Oh great they just destroyed a few windows. But hey we can easily replace them. Jennifer: Yeah no big deal. I see the others heading towards their ships. Michael: Ok then. TIME TO LOCK IN! (Dry Bones theme playing) Marylander: What was all the moaning up there for? Michael: Salty Marylander, they smashed a couple of windows. Marylander: NOW THEY’RE GETTING IT! (BOOM! BOOM!) “From 44, and Loop sneaks it in.” Madame: THEY’RE BACK? BACON FOR BREAKFAST! Poe: Whistling (Violet?) Violet: Whistling (Yes) Poe: Whistling (When should I use the Purple Scar?) Violet: Whistling (Uh now) Poe; Whistling (Just as I thought) “3rd and 6, steps away, McCarthy floating it for Jefferson downfield, and it’s intercepted. Picked off by Malaki Starks.” Violet: Whistling (Way to go handsome) Poe: Whistling (Edgar, Allan) Edgar/Allan: Whistling (Yes Poe) Poe: Whistling (I think it’s time for a sneak attack) Allan: Whistling (Oh I love sneak attacks) (BOOOOOOOOOM!) “1st Down and more, Keaton Mitchell into the secondary.” “And that’ll sneak through, so it’s now 10-6.” Vikings: AAAAAAAAAAAAH! (SPLASH!) Edgar: Whistling (One ship down, eight to go) Michael: I feel like when we blasted Madame Rouge into the Atlantic earlier, she had to have unleashed an alter ego. Jennifer: It seems like it. Well kudos to us for being prepared just in case she came back. (BOOOOOM!) “And we’ve got a one point game in Minneapolis.” Michael: And down goes another ship. My gosh there’s still seven of them left. I know what to do. SEND IN THE RAVENBOTS! Jennifer: Oh that’s right, I think it’s time we re-program them. Michael: On it. (WHOOOOOOOOOOSH!) RavenBots: REPORTING FOR DUTY MR HESSION. Michael: You see those Viking Ships out there, GO SWARM THEM WITH MOTOR BOATS! RavenBots: THANK YOU SIR. (DRAMATIC MUSIC) Jennifer: I think we’ve got her now! AND I’M SUPER CONFIDENT ABOUT IT HERE! Michael: Oh boy. PAUSE.
(Abracadabra playing) RavenBots: PAIN. PAIN. PAIN. Raven Bros: Whistling (THE BOTS!) (BOOM!) “On 3rd and 1, McCarthy looking deep, down the middle, Jefferson and Humphrey get tangled up and it’s an interception by Marlon Humphrey.” Marylander: There’s our insurance policy. Kate: Time to pick up slack everyone! (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) “And the Ravens take the lead, 12-10.” Poe: Whistling (Kate we’re gonna maul those Vikings!) Allan: Whistling (I think we bring out one of those magnets) Poe: Whistling (Great idea bro) (WHOOSH!) “Myles Price across the 20 yard, good coverage by the Ravens, the ball’s out, the ball popping out at the 23 yard line, and the Ravens have recovered.” Marylander: GIVE ME THAT CANNON ALLAN! (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) “Handoff to Justice Hill, he’s in, Touchdown Ravens.” Marylander: MEE HOOOOOOOOO! Edgar: Whistling (Pound that chest buddy) Marylander: SHAKE AND BAKE! Kate: And the hits just keep on coming. (BOOOOOOOOOOM!) “4th and 2, McCarthy, looking, trying to fit it into Jordan Addison.” Violet: Whistling (What was that) Kate: The RavenBots just blew up three Viking Ships. Raven Bros: Whistling (WAHOOOOOOO!) Michael: Wow, we are really coming to play. Jennifer: I know, I mean look at us, we can just chill out on the dance floor while everyone else is making life miserable for Madame Rouge. Michael: Just don’t go crazy and take your eyes off of the task. Jennifer: Ok. I think I’ve got an ice ball I can fire. Michael: Go ahead, as long as you don’t know one of our motor boats over you’re fine. (BOOM!) “Good snap and hold, the kick is wide to the left, no good.” Jennifer: Oops. Michael: Well you sunk one of the RavenBots boats, thank goodness it was any of the main three we desire. Jennifer: I know, thank goodness. Michael: UGH! (BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!) “A 43 yard kick from Reichard is good.” Crap. Jennifer: Oh that does not look good, they are going right for the RavenBots. Michael: Which doesn’t make sense since the boat that Edgar and the Salty Marylander are on is wrecking them. Jennifer: Well Poe and Allan are doing the same. Michael: Well since you missed with the ice gun. Let me try one. Jennifer: NO DON’T DO IT! Michael: TOO LATE! (BOOM!) Jennifer: Come on “Jackson on the roll, back of the end zone, and it is caught! Mark Andrews, with the touchdown!” (SPLASH!) Michael: HAHA! I told you. Jennifer: Remind me to never doubt you again. Madame: STOP ACTING LIKE A BUNCH OF FOOLS! YOU’RE BETTER THAN THIS! “McCarthy, looking, and wide of Jefferson at the 2.” Michael: MADAME GIVE IT UP! YOU’RE PLAN TO DESTROY US WAS A FABLE WRITTEN ALL OVER IT! Madame: Have fun there. (BOOOOOOOOOM!) “McCarthy under pressure somehow gets away, and McCarthy will throw on the run, and a juggling catch is made inside the 10 by Jalen Nailor!” Michael: Eh. Raven Bros: Whistling (WHAAAAAAAAAAT!) Jennifer: MICHAEL! MICHAEL! NOOOOOOOOOOOO! Madame: Goodbye you annoying brat. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! PAUSE.
“McCarthy to the end zone, it’s Nailor reaching out, he got his feet in and it’s a touchdown!” Jennifer: Not my future husband. Someone help me please god. MWA! MWA! MWA! MWA! I won’t stop kissing him until he wakes up! MWA! MWA! Michael: Woah. I just got the wind knocked out of me. Jennifer: MICHAEL!!! MWA! MWA! MWA! MWA! MWA! Michael: Ok ok. Well thank goodness you don’t wear lipstick despite how pretty you are because I’d have kiss marks all over my face. Anyways. GUYS, WE’RE GOING FOR THE KILL! Edgar: Whistling (He’s alive!) Kate: Michael’s ok? Allan: Whistling (I think he just got the wind knocked out of him) Kate: Alright then. Michael: Poe, Violet, what are you doing up here? Poe: Whistling (She and I wanted to make sure you were ok) Michael: I’m fine now Poe. Anyways I have an idea. Violet: Whistling (What’s that) Michael: There’s only three Viking Ships left, and I think if we all combined our fire guns together, we can kill them off, but this is dangerous. Jennifer: Guys you know the trick. Michael: RAVENBOTS AND FELLOW BEASTS! MOVE OUT OF THE WAY! Marylander; Wait what? Kate: I don’t know but we must obey our leader. Michael: On the count of 3, we press the switches on our guns and fire. Poe: Whistling (This is like Ghostbusters here?) Michael: Yup You ready? Poe: Whistling (Yes buddy) Michael: 1….2…..3! (BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!) PAUSE.
“They rush just three, McCarthy, clock continuing to wind, McCarthy directing traffic, all kinds of time running off, he throws incomplete, and the Ravens will take a snap and improve to 4-5.” (SPLAAAAAAAASH!) Poe/Violet: Whistling (WAHOOOOOOOOO!) Michael: CAN YOU BELIEVE IT! Jennifer: BYE BYE MADAME ROUGE! Michael: Yeah, have fun drowning in the Atlantic tonight. Jennifer: Well it’s after midnight too. Michael: Yup it’s Dia De Los Muertos for that devilish looking woman no pun intended. Poe: Whistling (FREAKING DEAD!) Michael: You know what else is freaking dead? Violet: Whistling (What?) Michael: The narratives that the Charm City Beasts have been left for dead. Jennifer: There you go. Well in particular the narrative of you losing a step, but I think you still have it. Michael: Jennifer I still have a lot of fight left in me. Speaking of which. Violet, bust some beats! Violet: Whistling (Alright) (Breakin’ Dishes playing) Michael: I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU THINK I AM! I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU THINK I AM! I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU THINK I AM! I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU THINK I AM! Jennifer: This is probably the first time I’ve seen Michael that excited to go on that dance floor. Poe: Whistling (There’s always a first time for everything) Jennifer: I feel like he needed this especially after what had been said about him while we were kidnapped, and even before then some thought he didn’t have it. Poe: Whistling (Yup, anyways I’m going to go join him) Jennifer: Have at it Poe. Michael/Poe: I’M BREAKING DISHES! ALL NIGHT! I AIN’T GONNA STOP UNTIL A SWIFTIE’S OUTTA SIGHT! IMMA FIGHT A LADY TONIGHT! IMMA FIGHT A LADY TONIGHT! IMMA FIGHT A LADY! A LADY! A LAAAAAAAADY! A LADY! A LADY! A LAAAAAAAADY! Marylander/Edgar: LETS FREAKING GOOOOOOOO! (BOOM! BOOM!) Michael: Fellow Beasts, there are two words that none of our enemies are going to want to hear from us? Kate: What’s that? Michael: WE’RE BAAAAAAAACK! Beasts: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Michael: Each day if we’re so lucky, we rise. We rise because there’s a fire that burns in us. It never burns out and it’s never burned brighter. We rise with an enthusiasm unknown to mankind. We rise… Beats: BECAUSE WE HAVE NO CHOICE! MIchael: WHO HAS IT BETTER THAN US! Beasts: NOOOOOOOOOOOBODY!
(CHARM CITY BEASTS)
Bragging Rights Sports 