The World Series. After three rounds of fighting everything comes down to this. I know I’m late putting this out there, but it’s better late than never. Alright how did things play out here:
Boston Red Sox (Cam Bleeping Schlittler): It just had to end at some point. There was going to be a day where Boston’s dominance over the Yankees would be put on halt. Well it happened here. Despite the Red Sox taking the opening game, the Bronx Bombers weren’t going to let their archrival take them out again. Especially in crunchtime. (Weren’t the Red Sox really good in 1 run games this year?) Even when Trevor Story witnesses the return to stardom and carries the Sox and on his back, the bullpen lets him down because Jazz Chisholm and Austin Wells combined to even the series. Then came a blast from the past in Game 3. Remember when you guys gave Bucky Dent and Aaron Boone new middle names? You better do the same for Cam Schlittler. (It’s not the same because Boston has 4 World Series titles since 04) He pitched the game of his life in the game of his life, shutting out the Red Sox lineup. I would say they shouldn’t have traded away Devers but I don’t think he would have helped. And here’s the piece de resistance. This is the 2nd time this year that a Boston team has lost to New York in the playoffs. And knowing the media up there in New England, they’ll want heads placed on tees. It sucks, but with that young core starting to blossom, mainly Jarren Duran and Roman Anthony, you’ll be back here again. Don’t take this loss too personally and gear up for Spring Training. (I expect Theo Epstein to be busy in the offseason)
Cleveland Guardians (Michigan > Ohio): You had to blow it didn’t you. You had come back from a 14 game deficit to win the AL Central, Detroit was handing you countless opportunities to win, and STILL you guys reinforced all of the narratives surrounding Cleveland Sports. And that’s even with getting barely outgunned by Skubal in Game 1. (You don’t leave the bases loaded in the 9th!) Look at Game 2 for crying out loud. Bryan Rocchio had his coming out party by hitting the go ahead homer in the 8th to put the Guardians up for good, plus Bo Naylor adding insurance after that. All the stars were pointing to Cleveland winning the series in Game 3, but then Dillon Dingler returned the favor by hitting the home run that put the Tigers up for good. Detroit gets their revenge for losing to Cleveland last year in the ALDS, the Guardians season ends with a thud. And right now I don’t know what’s going to happen. The Guards have pieces but there still seems to be something missing. And considering that they aren’t really huge spenders in free agency, they’re going to be trusting their farm system to get them out of it. I mean they have good pitching prospects coming. That’s always a plus.
Cincinnati Reds (The Luck Runs Out): I don’t think I need to say much here, the Reds were completely overmatched from the moment they took the field in Game 1. It was almost as if they allowed the Baseball World to laugh at the Mets and said “Yeah, we’re good.” (LOLMETS never gets old doesn’t it?) Cincy was beaten in every phase of the game. First it was Home Run Derby, where they let Shohei and Teoscar Hernandez each drop a pair of bombs on them. Second, it was getting outdone by SmallBall and situational pitching. The Reds may have talented young staff, but compared to the Dodgers, its GG Territory. This offseason is very crucial to their long term ambitions. Phil Castellini has the chance to prove that he isn’t the new age Marge Schott with his penny pinching habits (At least he is a much better person). Does Cincy go big game hunting for a star player on the open market, or do they sell off pieces again and constantly troll the fanbase. Knowing Phil and what he did 4 years ago, I’m guessing the ladder.
San Diego Padres (MLB’s Russell Crowe): Nothing screams Vintage San Diego more than the Padres crapping the bed when everything starts to matter. The first two games were nothing serious to the naked eye. The Padres and Cubs traded wins to force a do or die Game 3. But in Game 3 was where the air came out of the balloon. Not only did Yu Darvish reinforce his reputation as one of the biggest chokers in baseball, but due to horrific overmanaging by Mike Shildt (Thank goodness he’s retiring because Friars fans would be calling for his head) Chicago squashed San Diego’s vaunted bullpen. Then we get to Manny Machado. We tried warning you, Padres. We tried to convince you that he was a bad apple who panics and lets his emotions get the best of him but no you didn’t listen (Thank you Adam Jones for giving him those habits). And the same can be said about Tatis as well. And look at the free agent list they have coming up this offseason. Most of their big deadline acquisitions will be demanding new contracts and another overhaul is impending. I guess that’s the price of revenge. You know which series Dem Cubbies were getting it for.
New York Yankees (Operation One Minus Gerrit Cole): I have good news for most of America. We will not have to deal with Yankee Insufferability any longer, at least until next spring. Even though they made a mad dash to the finish line in the regular season, New York was completely exposed the moment they stepped on the field. “IF GERRIT COLE WAS HEALTHY, TORONTO DOESN’T STAND A CHANCE!” Here’s my counterargument. (Boo hoo, Toronto didn’t have Bo Bichette) It wasn’t the starting rotation that got mauled even though the Jays had success against them. It was the bullpen. (There was nothing that could stop Vlad Jr in this series) Luke Weaver lost his juju from last year, and Camilo Duval and Devin Williams, the less said the better. Think about this for a second. Aaron Judge finally has a spectacular postseason for the first time in his career, Jazz Chisholm and Cody Bellinger also put up gaudy numbers, yet the Yanks still got crushed by the Blue Jays. I would say change is inevitable but then you remember that Hal Steinbrenner has a soft spot for Aaron Boone and Brian Cashman. Nothing is going to change until both of their contracts run out on them or in the case of Cashman until he decides to retire. Enough talking from me. I think this quote sums up their series best………. DAAAAAAAAAA! JANKEES LOSE!
Detroit Tigers (Not A Total Collapse): Honestly it’s a miracle that the Tigers got this far given where they were at the end of the season. Normally when a team suffers one of the greatest collapses in recent memory you’d think they wouldn’t recover at all right. Well Detroit reappeared just in time for the playoffs. (Especially Javy Baez and Riley Greene) And after taking down Cleveland it looked like it may happen again. That series they had against Seattle was a classic. A back and forth battle where there was no margin for error. And after a Game 4 drubbing with Tarik Skubal on the mound for Game 5, it looked like the Tigers would finally get their redemption. But then they let Leo Rivas deliver the blow that tied the game. Into extras we go. A chess match in every sense of the word. Both teams brought out starters out of the bullpen to close things down. But then AJ Hinch got overconfident. Yes Tommy Kahlne’s reputation in the playoffs is impressive, but on this night he was overmatched from the moment he walked in. The killing blow; “Polanco, SENDS IT INTO RIGHT! IT WILL SEND SEATTLE TO THE AMERICAN LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP SERIES!” A brutal end to the longest winner take all game in Postseason History. Don’t worry too much Detroit, with that farm system and young core taking positive strides you’ll be back here again. Word of advice, don’t have an August and September free fall while you’re at it.
Chicago Cubs (David Ross Wasn’t The Main Issue): It doesn’t matter the sport, it doesn’t matter the rosters, it doesn’t matter the circumstances or timeframe. Wisconsin Sports shall lord over the city of Chicago until the end of time. (Whether its Favre, Rodgers, Giannis, or Yelich is up for debate) The fact that this went to 5 games is deceiving, the Brewers completely toyed with Dem Cubbies all series long. Outside of the first few innings of each game, Chicago could do next to nothing against Milwaukee. Whether it being giving up cookies or whiffing with ease is up for debate. Part of me feels like the Brew Crew wanted to troll the heck out of their I-94 rivals, and they did. Beat the breaks off of them during the first two games, then go MIA at Wrigley, deal with the reality of Cubs fans invading Miller Park for Game 5 only to rip their opponents hearts out at the end. That’s what happened in this series. The Cubs are close, but they need a few more elements to get over the top. One of them being Craig Counsell not letting his emotions get the best of him. He’s a good manager, but his tactics of overrelying on his bullpen in big games is what got him out of a job in Milwaukee, and it will hold him back in Wrigleyville. The moral of the story is simple. The rise of the Brewers wasn’t because of Counsell. It was because of Mark Attanasio. (The Brewers player development system speaks for itself given how much they’ve lost as of late) As a result, narratives are restored for all of the Cheeseheads out there.
Philadelphia Phillies (I Think I See Manny Motta Somewhere): You knew what you had to do. All that was left was overcoming the past few years and finally getting over the hump. What happened? Agony. And it wasn’t as if Philly got hammered, they tried their damndest to overcome the LA menace. In Game 1 they had the Dodgers by their throats. (BOOM!) And then Teoscar Hernandez took Matt Stram for a ride and gave LA the lead for good. (It’s a shape that Cristopher Sanchez ran out of gas) Game 2, Dodgers led 4-0 but you have the chance to pull off a miraculous comeback after mounting a 3 run rally. (BOOM!) And then Bryson Stott and Nick Castellanos get burned by the chef at the table at a Japanese steakhouse. A perfectly executed defensive relay to cut down a bunt attempt. Bummer. Game 3, Kyle Schwarber gets out of an early series slump and guides the Phils back into the series. They even have the lead in Game 4, all they have to do is not mess up and it’ll go back to Citizens Bank Park. (BUZZER!) And the games goes into extras. Great. But wait, Orion Kerkering is one out away from redeeming himself for blowing Game 2. It’s written in the stars. (BUZZER!) Shades of 1978. Losing the series on a walk off fielding error. Black Thursday reigns supreme in Philadelphia. (All four Philly teams lost in a span of 24 hours. WOOF!) And worst of all this might be their last great chance. Schwarber, Castellanos, Realmuto, and many others are hitting the free agent market, and Bryce Harper isn’t getting any younger. I would say all hope is lost but then we must remember that Dave Dombrowski is still their GM. And knowing him they’ll retool everything and make another run at it. Because it worked out well for him with the Tigers. In other words, I think the Phillies woke a sleeping giant.
Seattle Mariners (The Ultimate Gutpunch): Its always the franchises who have had to go through so much that gives the common fan pain even if their team may already be eliminated. It was there for the taking. A 2-0 series lead, turning SkyDome into a house of tumbleweeds and crickets. Cal Raleigh and Julio Rodriguez becoming the saviors of an entire region of the United States. GAME 5 MAN! Shades of 1995 against the Yankees where Eugenio Suarez turns into Edgar Martinez and puts Seattle on the brink of greatness. It was written in the stars as well, especially since they have the same goal horn as the Bruins who have given Torontonians nothing but pain and misery for the better part of the last century. But there was one major problem. They had to go back to Canadia. And the Blue Jays weren’t about to get humiliated like the Maple Leafs have been during the past decade. Game 6 it happens, Logan Gilbert was due for a bad outing. But Game 7. That may be the most painful loss that Seattle has seen since the Malcolm Butler interception in Super Bowl XLIX. The Mariners had a 2 run lead in the 7th inning, three outs away from turning things over to Andres Munoz for a 6 out save. What happens instead. “Fly ball, deep left field, going back on it is Arozarena to the wall, he looks up, THERE! SHE! GOES!” AGONY, THY NAME IS GEORGE SPRINGER! (Only fitting for a former Astro to deliver the dagger to Mariners fans hearts) Enchanted season, DONE! And this may sting for a while. But hey at least most of the core is coming back next year. Just don’t take a step back in 2026 ok.
Milwaukee Brewers (Uecker Magic Not Found): If the Brewers were a holiday I’d dub them Dia De Los Muertos. FREAKING DEAD! That is literally the best way to describe them in this series. It looked as if they used up all of their energy and excitement on beating the Cubs yet forgot that they were about to face the most expensive empire in the history of sports. This wasn’t just a massacre, this was like if the Dodgers dropped Bomb 17 on the entire state of Wisconsin. Milwaukee stood no chance against the billion dollar arms of LA. You wanna know how bad it was? The Brewers hit .100 for the entire series. With a lineup that was Top 5 in the NL in most categories. It comes to show you that the endless whining about how much of an unfair advantage that the Dodgers have especially against small market teams is justified. And here’s the piece de resistance. The one guy that Milwaukee had shut down all series was Ohtani of all people. What happened in Game 4? Arguably the greatest performance in baseball history. 3 home runs, 6 shutout innings, and 10 strikeouts. Nobody was matching that on that night. I think it’s safe to say that if anyone is going to make a case for baseball adding a salary cap, the Brewers would be at the top of the list. Especially with how overmatched they were in this series. No wonder why Pat Murphy had no faith in his rotation outside of Priester and Peralta and taxed the hell out of his bullpen. PAUSE.
You thought the last World Series was a matchup that nobody outside of those two fanbases wanted to see. This year is no different except this time around there will be passports required for the Fall Classic. Why? Because the American League is being represented by all of Canada.
Toronto Blue Jays: (SkyDome Construction Theme playing) Just like with the 2023 Rangers this is a team that I saw in person yet had no idea that they were going to make the World Series. Except this was different. Back in April I saw these guys in Baltimore on a day when the Orioles brought back their all orange uniforms for the first time since 1972. (I was down there to interview a few Penn State fans for a COMM 400 project so I went to Camden Yards during the downtime I had) That day Toronto blew a 3-0 lead in the 5th as the O’s held off a late rally in the 9th. Late July was even more insane. I saw these two teams in a double header on a 100 degree afternoon and the Blue Jays got their teeth kicked in by several Oriole players who were about to be traded at the deadline. In no way after watching those three games in Baltimore did I think that the Blue Jays would make the World Series. (Want It All by Queen playing) But baseball is a game where anything can happen. And even though many people said that the Jays got the #1 seed because of a soft AL and a sub 500 record on the road, the Boys of Summer have defied the odds. Not to mention they made premium salt as well. The Yankees. The redemption tour of Aaron Judge, a reloaded pitching staff even without Gerrit Cole, all of Mainstream Media rooting for them. KNOCKED OUT COLD! Seattle. The loveable underdog of baseball trying to make it to the World Series for the first time in franchise history. Game 5 allowed them to put the Blue Jays on the ropes. SKYDOMED IN GAMES 6 AND 7! After years of teasing us with great individual performances, Toronto finally used excellent teamwork to get this far. And what’s crazy is that all of their big offseason moves have blown up on them. I’m looking right at Anthony Santander and a recently extended Jose Berrios (No Alec Manoah either). But what they do have is some of the most breathtaking talents in the game. Let’s start with Vlad Jr. After giving him a 14 year extension earlier this year, it was unknown what the results would be. Let’s just say he’s become the next great savior of Canada. Completely outclassing Yankees and Mariners pitching for days on end. Behind the plate is a revived Alejandro Kirk. The last couple of years he’s been fighting injuries, but now that he’s fully healthy again, he’s back in 2022 form. Ernie Clement and Addison Barger are two young talents that should stabilize 3rd Base and Right Field for a while to come (Maybe not Clement but certainly Barger). Both Andres Gimenez and Daulton Varsho were looked at as terrible free agent signings back in August but now in October they’ve stepped up big time. And we haven’t even gotten to George Springer. Just like Joe Carter, Jose Bautista, and Edwin Encarnacion he won’t have to buy another drink in Toronto ever again because of a series clinching 3 run home run (The most wanted man in the Emerald City right now). And he also was considered a flop prior to 2025, but it comes to show you that you can do anything if you put your mind to it. And here’s the best part. Bo Bichette is coming back in the World Series. The longtime offensive catalyst of this franchise gets his chance at glory despite missing the first two series of the postseason, and it would be well deserved. The pitching staff has also shed the underachieving narratives as well. Both Kevin Gausman and Shane Bieber were only once cornerstones in Baltimore and Cleveland. Since coming to the Blue Jays, both of them have regained their once great forms elsewhere (Shades of Dave Stewart and Jack Morris). Trey Yesavage if you were to compare him to a 90s Blue Jay it would be Pat Hentgen. A complete unknown at the start of the year rising like a phoenix from the ashes. And oh yes, they brought in an aging but still effective Max Scherez to bolster the rotation. The bullpen for most of the year was their undoing especially Seranthony Dominguez and Jeff Hoffman who were both huge gets this year. Dominguez may still be inconsistent but Hoffman has rebounded and regained his electric stuff from Philly in 2024. This season has all but saved Ross Atkins’ job. Going into this season he and John Schneider were both on the hot seat due to not having won a playoff game since 2016 despite the talent on display. Now, if they win the World Series, they’ll be on the same level of fame as Cito Gaston and Pat Gillick. It’s been over 30 years since the World Series has been played in Canada and honestly it’s overdue. (“TOUCH EM ALL JOE! YOU’LL NEVER HIT A BIGGEST HOME RUN IN YOUR LIFE!” -RIP Tom Cheek) The O’s fan in me may hate this because they’re a division rival, but I have a soft spot for the people of Toronto especially given that I lived there for 6 weeks almost a decade ago. In my opinion Blue Jays fans are the loudest fans in all of baseball and whenever they are good it’s obvious to the naked eye. 4 wins stand between them and reliving the days of Joe Carter’s heroics on the big stage. But one thing stands in their path. Alexa play Mamma Mia music please “OK!” (Mamma Mia theme playing) NO I DIDN’T MEAN THAT SONG! (Money Money Money playing) “HOW ABOUT NOW!” THERE WE GO!
Los Angeles Dodgers: HERE YE! HERE YE! WHO WANTS TO WITNESS THE MOST EXPENSIVE INSEASON PAYROLL OF ALL TIME BACK ON THE BIG STAGE!!! Mixed emotions I see. If you were to ask any baseball fan back in Spring Training who would win the World Series it would be the Dodgers. “WHY PLAY ANY GAMES WHEN WE ALL KNOW WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN IN OCTOBER!” If you look at all of the money that they spent in the offseason. Being a massive reason why at least 15 owners want a salary cap introduced to the MLB. It was said in stone that they’d make it. But for a while it looked like they’d come undone. Especially after their bullpen kept blowing leads left and right. They nearly squandered the division to the Padres for crying out loud. But then we realize that like the 2023 Kansas City Chiefs, LA suckered us all into believing that they’d be yesterday’s news. OH HOW WRONG WERE WE! Not only that but they’ve broken everyone in their path. Cincinnati, a team that was looked at similarly to that Diamondbacks team that knocked LA off a couple years earlier, with Francona on a revenge tour. UTTER INHALATION! Philadelphia, a team eager to get back to the World Series with a hungry fanbase and many stars in contract years. UTTER INHALATION! And Milwaukee, a team of destiny, taking down the Cubbies and their old manager, plus the ghosts of Bob Uecker smiling down on them. UTTER INHALATION! The Dodgers do not care about feelgood stories. They are the destroyers of your hopes and dreams. A $750M payroll with no end in sight with contracts being deferred until the 2040s. Look at the riches they have. Shohei Ohtani, Mookie Betts, Freddie Freeman, Teoscar Hernandez, Max Muncy, Will Smith, Kike Hernandez, Tommy Edman, and Andy Pages. All of them are gamechangers who can beat you in every phase of the game. Especially Shohei and Mookie who basically tore down Milwaukee in the NLCS. Teoscar and the Fresh Prince of Chavez Ravine did so against Philly in their case. And here’s the funny thing. Their offense isn’t even their biggest strength. Look at that rotation and tremble in fear. All four of their top starters are making at least $300M in their contracts. Blake Snell, a former Cy Young Winner now getting the credit he finally deserves. Yoshinobu Yamamoto being a matchup nightmare with his change of speeds. (His performance in Game 2 against the Brewers is Exhibit A) Tyler Glasnow who like Snell started off in Tampa Bay and now in LA is a total demigod (Andrew Friedman loves his former Rays). And Shohei is now healthy again, and threw a 10 strikeout shutout to go along with a 3 homer game in the NLCS clincher. Even their bullpen is full of top notch starters. Clayton Kershaw in his last ride is now seen as a longman for crying out loud. Their big offseason prize Roki Sasaki is now their closer, and has the chance to become the Japanese Sandman if he keeps this up. And this is with Kirby Yates and Tanner Scott having issues all season long. (Plus Michael Kopech needing Tommy John) To Dodgers Country getting to the World Series isn’t a great accomplishment. IT’S THEIR BIRTHRIGHT! The chance to further establish themselves as a dynasty is at hand. The chance to become the first franchise since the Joe Torre Yankees to repeat as champions. (The first time an NL team would have done that since the Big Red Machine) And if that were to happen not only does Dave Roberts get one step closer to the Hall of Fame, the cries for a lockout would be outrageous. And they wouldn’t be cool at all. PAUSE.
(James Bond theme playing) Remember last year’s World Series, how nobody outside of New York and LA wanted Yankees vs Dodgers? It’s deja vu all over again. Sort of. While many baseball fans can all agree that watching the Dodgers in the World Series again is seen as predictable, the Blue Jays run was unexpected. However, there is a greater enemy that some fans are sleeping with now. CANADA! (It’s why there are many Americans who hate the Dodgers who will still root for them due to them playing a team north of the border) The fact that it’s a USA vs Canada World Series is proof that the bad blood between these two nations in the sports industry is only growing larger. Honestly I’m bleeding just by writing this. (Especially this close to the 250th Anniversary of America) And if the Four Nations Tournament in hockey wasn’t enough, now you’ve got this heavyweight battle to focus on. Not to mention both of those teams were competing heavily for the prizes from the Land of the Rising Sun the past several years. While the Dodgers won the Ohtani, Yamamoto, and Sasaki sweepstakes, guess who came in second place? TORONTO! It’ll probably be the same for Murakami this offseason as well. This is either going to be the series that leads baseball to its next lockout, or the series that leads to all of Canada memeing Donald Trump to death yet again. THE GRUDGE MATCH OF THE FOUR NATIONS TOURNAMENT HAS ARRIVED!
Prediction: On paper this series should be Captain Obvious. The Dodgers have the talent and starpower to win this series with ease. However I’m going to use a history reference to back my prediction. 1992. A Blue Jays team that had been knocking on the door for years against Baseball’s Mega Empire from Atlanta (The Braves had just added both Greg Maddox and Fred McGriff). Despite being massive underdogs to the ATL, Toronto won four separate one run games including an extra innings in the clincher to pull off a landmark upset. To me this series is written in the stars. Just like each of that city’s last three major sports championships, Toronto is winning this series in 6 games with Vlad Jr joining Joe Carter and Dave Winfield in Canadian World Series lore. If that happens all of LA will be quoting Prince Harry and Meghan Markle during that hilarious South Park skit… “WE WANT PRIVACY! WE WANT PRIVACY!!!”
Bragging Rights Sports 