I know I have been overdue for one of these episodes since last Sunday. I have been hearing you guys. I have been watching too much NBA and NHL games since those leagues have started up again. Anyways let the salt begin!
Tonight on CHARM CITY BEASTS! The statement win against their old foe in Tennessee leads to their biggest test yet! Despite the Ravens getting the 6 year playoff monkey off of their backs the Road to Tampa has gotten even tougher for their players. With potential snow in the forecast this weekend several players like Bradley Bozeman and Chuck Clark reached out to the media this week saying that they have never played in the snow. Oh yes another one of those guys that hasn’t played in the snow happens to be Action Jackson, he claims that the only time he has played in the snow was a snowball fight at Louisville. (If Harbaugh was smart last year before the Titans game then he would have had experience that week in practice.) Also the haters went from saying that Lamar can’t win a playoff game to he can’t win a Super Bowl. I mean how many times are you going to tell him this he’s too good to be doubted. (Also didn’t he download Mike Jones newest album this week too.) The same can also be said about Marcus Peters who has been in a social media conflict between him and several Bills fans, the reasoning was drinking a chug of beer after he swatted their comeback hopes in Week 14 of 2019. In my opinion CLASS A act by them.
Just like last week the Ravens have to go on the road in the playoffs to face another cocky fanbase in the infamous BillsMafia. All of their fans have been all but handing Buffalo the Lombardi Trophy. They have claimed that their receiver corp is unstoppable and that Josh Allen is the best QB in the NFL. Let’s be real, they haven’t made the AFC Championship Game since 1993, and still have the Buffalo McKinley Curse (Which insists that since the assassination of President William McKinley in 1901 at the Worlds Fair which was in Buffalo, that city has failed every time it has taken the Nation’s centerstage ever since.) This matchup is full of star contrasts. The Old School Perennial Powerhouse from Baltimore vs the Insufferable Flashy Squad in Buffalo. Which means a franchise that is one of the most spoiled vs one of the most cursed franchises in the game. The Ravens are entering the NFLs Arctic Circle where a ruckus Ralph Wilson Stadium is out for anything that is Purple and Black or Lamar Jackson.
This like almost every game for the last few weeks involves a serious tone. This matchup of Pass and Run Heavy teams in front of a National TV Saturday Night audience begins with both teams trying to gain control. The Ravens right on schedule went down the field and got deep into Bills territory, the bad news is that the offensive line gave up a 12 yard sack but at least got back into field goal range. “Tucker’s kick is OH IT HITS THE UPRIGHTS!” The good news for the defense is that they were able to give the offense the ball back. But this time the run game was stopped by Buffalo and their crafty blitzes. “Koch WHIFTS THE PUNT AND IT GOES OUT AT THE 40 YARD LINE OF BALTIMORE!” I mean dude what is happening to the Wolfpack? Well they weren’t expecting gusting winds of 30 MPH to hit them during the game. Anyways despite the Bills making it to the rezone they almost missed their field goal too. Trailing 3 nothing Action Jackson overcame at one point a 2nd and 33 to get them back into field goal range. Let’s see if JT can overcome his earlier miss. BOOM! ARE YOU KIDDING ME TUCKER YOUR JOB IS TO KICK THE FOOTBALL THROUGH THE DARN UPRIGHTS! HOW ARE TURNING INTO BILLY CONDIFF!!! PAUSE. Despite that play that shall not be discussed the Bills drove to the Ravens 28 but they too can’t make field goals in the horrible wind. Luckily Tucker made one right before the half to make it 3-3. But once again his bad night would continue as JT kicked the ball out of bounds thus resulting in Buffalo getting the ball at the 40 yard line. That was the advantage Josh Allen would need as the Bills finally were able to score a touchdown against the vaunted Baltimore defense. It’s ok though because Action Jackson and Hollywood are once again putting together another solid drive, This time they got into the red zone with a chance to tie the game. As long as we don’t shoot ourselves in the foot again we have a chance. You may think that we will get stopped but we see the glories of (Taron Johnson Pick6 and Lamar Concussion)AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (The Narrator/Marylander is dealing with a panic attack and cannot be able to speak, please try again later)
Well there goes any optimism this city has for another Super Bowl. The sad part about this is just like the Titans game last year they didn’t score a touchdown in a Saturday Night Primetime game in the 2nd Round. I thought this team was different, I thought they were mentally tough and could overcome anything that came their way. At least they are confident for next season I guess. Well let me get an explanation for this game.
Lamar, listen to me. Don’t listen to the media and let them trash you. You are too likeable of a guy to do that. Honestly I can safely say that yes he may struggle in big games but let’s be real. This game wasn’t even his fault. He did everything he could to win yet just got robbed. I know people are going to say that he can’t throw and they will likely say that Derrick Henry the Bills defense threw and scored more touchdowns than the Ravens did in each of the playoff games that they recently lost. Even Tom Brady, Peyton Manning or Patrick Mahomes would have made the read he did on that Pick6 that killed off our comeback hopes. Don’t worry buddy the guy you replaced in Joe Flacco went through this as well and you just need to learn from it. Too bad his season ended with the Madden Curse. PAUSE
Greg Roman needs to be and should have been fired after last year’s game against the Titans! I mean everyone is going to say that Lamar is a choker but let’s be real. Roman has choked in the playoffs everywhere he has been. During his career as a QB coach and OC he has lost 6 Conference Championships and Super Bowls XXXIX, and XLVII. He can’t adjust to opposing teams defenses, he goes into panic mode whenever they are trailing, and he just can’t design trick plays that actually work. It makes sense since that was the case he had with Donovan McNabb, Michael Vick, Colin Kaepernick, and Tyrod Taylor. To me he is falling into the same traps that Jim Fassell did in 2006, and Cam Cameron in 2011 not to mention the infamous Marty Moringweig in 2018. Don’t worry Roman, Harbaugh will keep you around because of loyalty. At least he was a key reason for why we even made the playoffs. PAUSE
This was one of the WORST Offensive Line performances I have ever seen this team have in the years that I have been a Ravens fan. I know that Marshal Yanda retired, Ronnie Stanley and Nick Boyle were out for the season, plus they had to play guys out of position but let me ask you this. Can Patrick Mekari ever show up in a playoff game. Last year he gave up 3 sacks to the Titans and this year he had 6 bad snaps, one which led to Lamar getting knocked out of the game. Not to mention they gave up a franchise playoff record 8 sacks. Luckily we don’t pick until 27 which means we probably get another center and Stanley will be back at LT, Orlando Brown Jr will be at RT again, and Tyre Phillips will be at RG. At least that’s the good news. I’m guessing that they are trading their 1st Round Pick for Julio Jones. PAUSE
John Harbaugh if I were to criticize some of your actions this year I don’t know where to start. You epitomize this team as a whole, NOTHING BUT TALK! Talk all of the nonsense you want about the Chiefs but do you want to know something, THEY HAVE A CULTURE! They wouldn’t accept any of the nonsense you let your players do on Social Media during practice. Remember how everyone was saying that Earl Thomas got himself out of town with some of the actions he did? Who was at fault, THE PLAYER OR THE HEAD COACH!? This game against the Bills was one of the few times that he has been beaten at his own game which is Special Teams and the Offensive Line. Look at some of the excuses that he made about the crowd noise in Buffalo and the wind, Why weren’t you aware of that this week! I mean look at him in the playoffs since the Super Bowl in 2012. 3 wins in 8 years, and those were to a Broncos team with a Backup QB, (Brock Osweiller) a Steelers team without Le’Veon Bell, and a Titans team missing half of their defense. This would get plenty of coaches fired but not under Steve Bisciotti. He dealt with Brian Billick and his QB carousel during the 2000s and now we are likely dealing with this. Don’t worry Harbs you are the main reason that this team went as far as they did despite the odds they faced over Thanksgiving with all of the COVID cases. I’m proud of you! PAUSE.
Out of all of the players that would cost us the last 2 would figure out to be Justin Tucker and Sam Koch. For Tucker this isn’t just the 2 field goals that hit the uprights Saturday Night. Since the 2018 Wild Card game against the Chargers he has missed a field goal in a record tying 4 straight playoff games. Plus Koch never shanks 2 punts in a game let alone 1. I know it’s hard to admit this but those 2 plus Morgan Cox are each in their 30s and are starting to decline. But to be honest where would Harbaugh and Ozzie Newsome be if it weren’t for those 3 during the 2013, and 2015-17 seasons. Thank goodness they are still going to be huge assets of the team going forward even if Koch gets close to retirement. PAUSE.
I was not going to rip the Ravens hard unlike last year because of what they did to even get to this point. A 6-5 record going into December with perhaps the biggest COVID outbreak in all of sports should have resulted in most of the coaching staff getting fired and going from 14-2 in 2019 to missing the playoffs in 2020. The one thing I was impressed with despite the loss against Buffalo was how much they wanted to get back in the same spot that they were just in when they lost. This is a well run organization that encourages every player or employee to be at their best even if things go wrong for them. Even if I got fresh material for this series almost every week I can say that the first season of Charm City Beasts was a true success. Even if there was drama at some point and a typical Ravens ending to a season unlike in 2000 and 2012 they never gave up. Thank goodness despite losing Mark Ingram Willie Snead as well as a few others we will have enough Cap Space to bring in either Allen Robinson or Kenny Golladay as the #1 Wide Receiver, draft the Center of the Future, and bring back either Yannick Ngakoue or Matt Judon. It will be a few weeks until the Season 1 finale but at least I can have some peace and calmness until Free Agency begins. Go Ravens!
Bragging Rights Sports 